Bringing the love. (Photo: Shutterstock)
Wishing to outrank his oldest brother*, he is also going through the process of trying to secure an appointment to one of the Service Academies, which is a highly political process where you beg and plead with a bunch of overweight political aides whose only knowledge of “push-ups” is what they’ve seen on the Victoria’s Secret website. He has gone through one of three scheduled interviews (number two is this Saturday) and he has advanced to the point where he’s been requested to take a physical.
The nearest place to get this accomplished was a walk-in clinic about 30 miles away. Now, the DOD awards contracts to the lowest bidders to process ROTC and Academy physicals and they do this stuff for a flat rate and with all the efficiency and care that such contracts require. When we got there we were told that there was only one Physician’s Assistant available and because it was a “she” we were given the option to continue or reschedule if he was uncomfortable with that and wanted a male examiner. Since he was already missing classes to get this done it was full speed ahead.
After a nurse did all the preliminaries we were ushered into an exam room and waited. And waited. And waited some more. Finally, there came a knock on the door. After apologizing for being late, the PA also apologized for the nurse’s lack of complete instructions. “You need to put these on,” she said as she reached into a drawer and pulled out a pair of disposable paper-like shorts. “You can leave your underwear on and I’ll leave the room while you change.”
When she returned her first instruction was for him to drop his pants – both of them – so she could make sure he had both testicles and check for hemorrhoids. Now, if you’re going to do that, why all the modesty theatrics? “I can’t be in the room when you put on these silly paper shorts because I might see your underwear but now that you have them on, please pull them down to your knees and let me see your privates?” Really? That is a procedure so stupid it had to emanate from a government bureaucrat.
It’s just not stupid – it’s government stupid.
Now, I also know what you’re thinking. Why would he want to make any commitment to the US military, especially with Grandpa Scratch’n’Sniff in the White House? He’s rolling the dice for sure, hoping that President DeSantis will be addressing the graduating Class of 2026. If the first ten months of this administration is any indication, that commencement speech might be given by President Xi for all we know. Otherwise an Academy education is valued at around a quarter of a million dollars, something his parents are unable to give him.
He’s already been told by several people, including his Blue and Gold officer from Annapolis, that he’s the wrong color, the wrong gender, and the wrong sexual orientation. It’s discouraging as all hell. The good news is that two of the three politicians that he’s dealing with (and he only needs one to get a nod) are Republicans. And one of those is retiring so the choice is of no consequence to any re-elect decisions. But still, it’s just not stupid – it’s government stupid, or as Claremont Senior Fellow David Reaboi calls it, “Late Republic Nonsense.”
And with an Academy education comes entrance into the ultimate frat world. That ring is a lifetime door opener. Now he just has to get past the stupid – the government stupid.
*Older brother is no longer in the Marines. He has finished his contract. However, he gets his Bachelor of Science in the spring and is considering re-enlistment to OCS in Quantico. Same reservations apply.
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November 02, 2021 at 04:50AM
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